Overstimulation has never really been an issue for me, like it is for many INFJ's. The sensory input my brain manages is pretty damn streamlined. Intake leads to internal processing that I don't even think about. I absorb and process my environment like a champ, regardless of how much is happening in my environment at any given time. I'm cool with stimulation.
No, my problem is workload. I have a to-do list that if written down, would probably stretch the length of a football field. This is both personal and professional tasks that I wish to complete. If I focus on one thing, which I'm great at, things are fine until that task is finished. Then, I look to my to-do list. Upon seeing the endless shit I've either promised others or myself I will accomplish, I go catatonic. Or I panic. Most of my anxiety comes from trying to figure out how to spend my time. This is why on weekends, when I have two whole days to do stuff, I end up staring into space (seriously) or reading.
This leads to problems. My to-do list is never shortened and the problems I need to solve are still there for me on Monday. It's endless and cumulative so the end just gets further and further away. I know there will always be something on my list but getting that narrowed down to fit on a regular sheet of paper would be nice. It's gotten to the point where I would rather vacuum my house than tackle something on my list because I just cannot decide what to do.
I love my husband, but he is no help in this aspect. He just wants me to be happy because he knows how hard I work. That just leads me to be lazy and procrastinate...only compounding the problem.
I really don't know how to fix this part of me. Even if work tasks were out of the picture, my personal goals are even longer and more complicated than anything my job in marketing could throw at me.
Here is an example of the cumulative effect...
After consulting my internal to-do list, I finally go through my clothes and divide into throw away, donate, and sell piles. The throw away pile is taken care of immediately (thanks to my husband...he likes throwing unneeded stuff away) but the donate pile and the sell pile are still in my office taking up a shit load of space. To make things worse, my cats love sitting on those piles, so now before I donate/sell I need to wash everything. Problem. I somehow haven't found the time to take the clothes to Goodwill/Salvation Army or to sell them at Plato's Closet. Even though it has been THREE WEEKS since I purged my closet of stuff that doesn't fit anymore. THREE WEEKS this stuff has been sitting around. I look at it every day, all day - it's in my office, right in front of my desk. You would think that should be enough to make me get rid of it but nope...still there.
The piles of clothes, in turn, make it very difficult for me to vacuum and clean my office. Guess what also hasn't been done? Ding ding ding! You got it - I haven't cleaned my office (or my house) for weeks either.
Because I haven't cleaned, I also haven't started any new craft projects. Why you ask? Because the pile of clothes is sitting on top of my art supplies chest. It's heavy. I can't open it.
I know if you are reading this you are probably thinking, what the hell is wrong with this chick? How lazy can one person be? I will admit that I am lazy but I'm also driven. Once I get that one task on my mind, I will focus, single-mindedly, until it is done. I almost feel like I need someone to go through my list and tell me what to do. Which then of course I wouldn't do because someone told me what to do. Being an INFJ is difficult because you always get in your own way. And nothing sucks more than being the cause of your own failure.
Do you feel overwhelmed a lot? How do you manage your life and the many ideas and things you want to accomplish? (Seriously, I need some ideas on how to fix this from other INFJs!!!)
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